Happy Full Moon in Aries <3
The tail end of Virgo season had me really getting nit picking about everything. With Chiron aspected this full moon, a lot of my own self-worth issues are bubbling up, asking for deeper healing and attention.
Something that is really helping me is witnessing my own progress, especially since I became a mother just over nine years ago. Motherhood was my initiation into rapid transformation and the relinquishing of all that I thought I knew, of all that I possessed, and my identity as a whole.
I still struggle to show myself compassion and gentleness, I still get caught up in the spirals of shame and guilt but I see how much progress I have made in terms of the strength of my will, determination, and self-awareness. I have a larger capacity to trust and am getting glimpses of the impact my words and work can have in the world.
More recently I have been giving myself kudos for embracing more structure. There was a moment in time where I planned to never send my kids to school and home school them instead. I am able to see how the dedication to my art and creativity has shifted my priority to embracing the resources available so that I have time to do so and I am better because of it. I have had to come to terms with the limits of my time and ability to spend time with people I care about. I have become glaringly aware of how stretching myself thin has given others unrealistic expectations of me and thus left them disappointed when I wasn’t able to maintain those expectations.
Because I struggle with self-worth and feeling valuable, it is crippling to know that I have disappointed someone. My deeply empathic nature can sense hurt and disappointment, which makes it extremely difficult to focus on my needs as I can feel others struggles so acutely. I put up a front of being strong and able to carry the weight of the world with ease and grace but it is crippling.
My word this year is support. Support for myself. Putting in place systems, structures, and resources for me. Practicing receiving and being realistic with the priorities I set and getting really clear on how those are serving me. Having a solid foundation and determining my limits helps me to not slip into negating my own needs.
Here’s the mantra for this full moon:
The contrast of not enough and too much
Helps me to appreciate all beauty
And acts as a catalyst for when
I need to shift my priorities.
My tender spots show me where
The richest soil is
For my greatest
Healing, growth, and blooming.